Saturday, 28 September 2013
Opposition to the GCSB bill
On the 8th of May 2013, Prime Minister John Key had introduced the new GCSB bill. With this announcement there has been many backlash coming from other parties especially from Labour leader David Shearer and Green Party co-leader Russel Norman. They have argued that with this new bill, New Zealanders have restricted freedom and expression of their rights to live without surveillance. New Zealand is a country that enjoys relative freedom and peace, however now that the Government can spy on everyday Kiwi's this has become a threat to our democracy and our lives. Although John Key has stated that before someones metadata can be collected a warrant must be issued by the Prime Minister himself and the Commissioner of Security Warrants, still does not satisfy the other parties. Labour leader David Shearer states that "basically the Prime Minister is asking New Zealanders to trust him and they shouldn't take their privacy on trust".
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I am commenting on this post but my comment is for each of the posts you have done as a whole. I like the topic that you have chosen for your argument, it is a strong one and is a really current issue within New Zealand. You have clearly done some great research for your topic and that is well shown throughout your writing, There are a few problems within your writing though, mainly grammar issues. You have said such things as 'a issue' instead of 'an issue' but small grammar mistakes like this can easily be fixed and do not distract too much from your writing. Also at first I was a little unsure of what side you are really on? It seems very factual compared to opinions and facts mixed together. I think saying 'I think that' or something similar will add a personal touch to your argument. Good luck though and can't wait to see the finished result.
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